It's just not the Jaim without me!

Ahhhh...It's Not About Me, It's About Her

2010-03-02T14:40:00.020-05:00

Haiden THRILLED to meet Cindi and Snowy

So, you have a child and you have ideas about things. I did not want Haiden to wear all pink. I wanted her to be able to be comfortable and active in whatever she wore. I never wanted to catch myself saying, "Don't run in your dress." I just didn't want to raise her to be a girly girl.

What is that anyway? Really, Wayne and I created Haiden, she is our daughter. I thought, I am not going to raise a sissy. I am not going to put her in pink frilly dresses, etc. etc. Well, she did come from me, but she is not "mine." She is our daughter, but she is her own unique person.

It was a wonderful realization when I bought her the sparkly, pink, frilly dresses that she would love it. She did. SHE would love it. That is what matters. Just because we have children does not mean we should not honor who they are. Haiden loves to run around and jump in mud and she likes to dress up, carry a purse and wear a tiara. That is wonderful, that is Haiden.

Haiden asking Snow White a few questions...

We had a great time at the princess party we took her too. She was smiling ear to ear the whole day. She was SO happy to meet Snow White and Cinderella. Sure, she was wearing a beautiful, pink, frilly dress, but she was still Haiden.

Haiden and her Daddy, building memories...

My favorite part of the day is when my inquisitive child asked Snow White and Cinderella about their stories. She asked Cinderella, "Are you still with Prince Charming?" "Are your stepsisters nice now?" and she asked Snow White, "Why did you eat the poison apple anyway?" It was so wonderful to watch the other little girls listen to the "big girl princesses" every word. I am sure the college students who were dressed as Snow White and Cinderella had no idea they would be quizzed! They did a great job answering the questions. It was a quality event put on by a hospitality class at MSU.

Haiden asking Cinderella a few questions-with the other princesses listening intently!

Watching Haiden have true curiosity about Cinderella and Snow White was fantastic, it was critical thinking at its best! I am so proud to honor who Haiden is and who she is becoming. All of the preconceived things I worried about were before I had the realization that this little lady was one of a kind. I look forward to honoring who she is for the rest of her life. She is only three now...so the best is yet to come on this-lord help me when she is a teen!

Get Out of Your Own Way!

2010-02-08T15:37:00.002-05:00

People (self) included...get out of your own way. Life will through up road blocks, but, don't get in your own way too. Stop making excuses, take care of yourself and handle your business. I get in my own way and I really need to have my own back. Today, I pledge to get out of my own damn way! If you are keeping yourself from achieving, stop.

Much love, J

What happens when you increase calories &...

2010-01-07T13:49:00.003-05:00

What happens when you increase calorie intake and decrease exercise?

Yep! I gained a wee bit of weight over the holiday month...3ish pounds. I am back at WW and start a new exercise class today. It is harder getting back going than it was going...

I guess I remembered all the yummy things in life. Time to monitor myself and get those three pounds off and 25 more by June 29th. Wish me luck! This eating healthy and exercising is proving more difficult with all of the holidays and the winter! :) Although winter won't last forever. I am excited to use my new bike when the sidewalks are clear.

That is my update!

The New Year Cometh

2009-12-30T09:46:00.004-05:00

What have I lost in 2009? Or what have I gained in 2009? The new year is around the corner and 2010 is going to be a good year. I have a creative project I am working on. I am ready to continue working hard at work-loving my job. I am ready to get back on track with exercise since I took a wee hiatus over the last few weeks...

I want to build on the progress I made in the last half of 2009. I would like to loose 25 more pounds by June 29th. I am looking forward to riding my bike, taking a new exercise class and I love that I had to ask for new clothes for Christmas because my old clothes are just too big. So, I have lost weight and gained a better understanding about nutrition, choices and most of all that I can accomplish my goals with hard work.

Stay tuned to hear more about my creative project. I have been wanting to do this for a long time and one lunch hour ignited a spark that has lay dormant for a long time. I welcome 2010!

My Oh My, How Time Flies

2009-11-25T09:39:00.005-05:00

Haiden feeding the goat at Country Mill

Time has flown by since I last blogged about the summer. Fall has been filled with adventures and a lot of work. Good news to report on the battle. I have lost 28 pounds since May. Not bad, not bad at all. I have "under-grown" most of my pants. I have to literally tighten my belt, so today, I will be rewarded by purchasing a few pair of pants. A girl has to have a good pair of jeans and a pair of black pants! I have like three pair of pants I can still get away with, but ... seven pair or more will be going to consignment. Why? I do not plan to ever need them again. Thanksgiving is coming up, Christmas and challenges, but I plan to AT LEAST maintain. Wish me luck!

About our wonderful child...

Haiden on her thrid birthday morning

Haiden is cracking me up these days. She has had some memorable phrases, like "I love the story Hansom and Gretel." and "It's OK Mommy, you can watch whatever you want. I don't mind. It's good operation! (meaning cooperation, but good enough!) "Mommy, I don't have breasts or freckles, how did you get them?"

She is noticing EVERYTHING too. When having some family time down stairs in the "man room," Haiden was looking at Wayne's signed and framed basketball jersey. She asked, "Daddy, why is your shirt in that box?" It's true actually, they notice things we don't think are that strange. They hear things we block out. Every time we walk outside she says, "Do you hear the..." train, birds, car, firetruck, etc. I have to tune in and listen. She is right. What is the lesson in this? Pay attention to children, they notice things we block out, take for granted or miss in our daily lives. It is nice to take time to listen to the birds!

On HOLIDAYS: We had a wonderful Halloween! She and Mommy were witches and Daddy was a ghost. Wayne had been gone most of October, so my Mother mentioned perhaps it was type casting, since Haiden decided what we would all be! LOL. HEY! Wait a minute... I guess everyone in my family has jokes!

Family: We had a few family challenges, my Mom was in the hospital (I was with her) and she had an emergency appendectomy. My Dad had knee replacement, my Mother-in-law is retiring and will be splitting her time between Michigan and South Carolina. My Mom may need to retire early due to contract negotiations. Meanwhile, Wayne, Haiden and I are happy, healthy and thankful to be gainfully employed (Wayne and I, Haiden isn't working...).

That about says it all! Winter is on it's way...I will have more down time to write. :)

Update on the Battle

2009-09-05T18:18:00.002-04:00

Since I have joined Weight Watchers. I have lost over 10 pounds. I am feeling good about it and not deprived in any way. I am down 18 pounds since I began this journey. Tonight we are having a Weight Watcher's recipe for Chicken Marsala. It is soooooo good that I would order it in a restaurant. I have been working out at least 4 days a week and know my schedule will get busier now and I will have to reprioritize. It is great to have Wayne on board and cooking new recipes and meal planning. Love having Lis to send my points too and for walking, H20 and encouragement. I know there will be ups and downs, but I am optimistic and feeling good. Less eating out, less time with friends and volunteering...there are sacrifices I am not loving, but I have to put my health first.

Thanks for all the support! I tried on a dress the other day and realized my legs looked good....I almost forgot that the shape beneath it all can come back :).

Wish me luck and continued success for this life long journey!

Mackinac Island

2009-08-31T19:14:00.008-04:00

Great travel companions!

Lis and I on a bike break-taking in the beauty of the island.

O and Lis at dinner, it was a GREAT dinner!

A self portrait of us on our trek.

What a perfect weekend.

1. Fantastic travel partners

2. An 8.3 mile bike ride after not riding a bike in over twenty years!

3. A perfect spa pool to relax in after bike ride...

4. A folk singer in the Pink Pony singing Joni, Indigo Girls and Stevie Nicks...I was in heaven. JONI! WOW!

5. A great blend of walking, bike riding, being carted around by horses and lounging.

6. "crackers"

7. Bats dive bombing us and Lis squealing like a she was about to be attacked by enemy combatants.

8. Orion's crooked walk after the beverage I selected for him...

9. The rain held out!

10. Spending time with my honey and sleeping in...Grandma watching Haiden...

Squeaking the summer out of the summer...

2009-08-18T09:09:00.004-04:00

Victoiously flying a kite!

Cohen and Haiden making "soup"... we had sandwhiches for lunch!

I know there will be months coming up where I won't want to spend much time in the sub zero...so I am squeaking out what is left of summer. I feel good about Glen Arbor, the visit to my Grandma's, the Warner Family Camout, a kayaking trip up and down the Grand River and the weekend trips to the park and the zoo... a lot of time spent outside. This past weekend was no exception Lis, Orion, their lovely child Kib Kib, their niece Layla, nephew Cohen, Wayne, Linda, Linda, myself and Haiden headed up to Grand Haven to my Aunt Sally and Uncle Wayne's. It was the PERFECT day at the big lake. I can't remember a day I have spent at Lake Michigan where everything was so perfect. The waves were big enough to play in but not so big they knocked you over. It was hot enough to want to be in the water, but not too hot to play on the beach. I flew a kite...seriously, it has been decades! I blogged about my Aunt Sally and Uncle Wayne's place last summer. It is really special. We were lucky enough to spend the day on a stretch of private Lake Michigan beach. We could see the overcrowded public access beach and were even more thankful. With three children to keep track of, it sure is easier without hundreds of other people there they can get lost in. One of the highlights of my day was revisiting my trip to the buoy with Lis and Wayne. I remember what a big deal it was when I was a kid to make it "all the way" out the buoy. Really it is only over my head for five feet or so of swimmnig...but back then it was "living on the edge." I felt the same sense of exhileration to touch the bouy without it bashing into my head as I approached it. I LOVE the water and this day was a perfect day to spend in it. Not to mention the kids and the dog were perfectly behaived in the car, on the beach and in the restaurant for dinner. BONUS!

Aunt Sally and Uncle Wayne's cottage is stuck in time...a good time, a traditional Michigan summer house with outstanding views of the lake.

I know I am in better shape this year than last, because the over 100 stairs I took to get to the cottage and then back down to the beach and back up to the car didn't hurt as bad. Haiden even walked every last step this year. The kids were little "show offs," hopping up the steps :). Ahhhhh, to have endless energy.

I spent a good three hours in the water and a few more hours on the beach. . . On to the next adventure! Mackinac, here we come! Adults only this time! :) I look forward to sqeeking every little bit of summer that we have left out of the summer!

My Weekend

2009-08-10T10:28:00.007-04:00

Haiden Kissing Daddy at dinner...

My favorite treat of the summer...smores!

Haiden with her Grandma Linda and Vovo

Sunshine Cottage

Best parts about the weekend:

1. Three generations travelling together and everyone having fun!
2. The Sunshine Cottage in Glen Arbor
3. The two bites of deliciousness I tasted from the local pastry shop-still on WW, but WOW the cream cheese lemon bar was one of the best things I have ever tasted!
4. Playing in Lake Michigan with my daughter even though it was cold.
5. Spending some great family time in one of the most beautiful places in Michigan.

Worst parts about the weekend:

1. I managed to not take enough pictures- go figure!
2. More sunshine would have been nice
3. The check out time was WAY too early
4. It was too short
5. It was too short

Overall we had a great trip to Glen Arbor and a nice day trip to Fish Town in Leland. The soft serve was a hit with Haiden and Wayne found some killer pizza for $2.25 a slice. We grilled and cooked at the cottage most of the time, that was a great way to save money and to eat healthier.

I can't wait for next year when we rented a house for a week up there. This was just recon! I can't wait to kayak up there either. We spied on the house we rented next year. Looks nice! Can't wait...it will just be a few blocks to town, and close to the water!! Can't you hear Tim Allen's voice now...Pure Michigan...

Batteling the Bulge!

2009-07-24T10:29:00.005-04:00

So, here I am a few months into the journey. I saw a number on the scale that disgusted me and started eating healthy again. The trouble is, I wasn't doing it with enough structure. So I lost 5 lbs and then gained two...

So, after my friend DTC was in town with her average body telling me how she was on Weight Watchers and how I HAD to do it...ARG! I had heard that enough times, so ... I had to admit I should try it. Why hadn't I before? I had this feeling of failure to do Weight Watchers. I felt like I should be able to do it on my own. I usually do well at the things I set my mind to. But, as DTC painfully pointed out, the things I do well at come relatively easily to me...this does not. It killed me to admit it, but it is hard for me and I comfort myself and celebrate with food. It is not healthy for me and I am going to die younger than I should if I don't get my ass in gear. I don't exercise enough and don't make the best choices when we eat out. I am not a closet over eater, but it does not mean I don't have a problem. My Mother In Law has commented, "I see everything you eat, I don't know why you are so over weight." Ouch and thanks? So, genes, inactivity and choices are the answer to that question.

I am now doing Weight Watchers. I am excited about it actually. I said I was considering it out loud to a friend and Lis said she would do it with me. So, we signed up on line (and she tutored me and everything to make it easier for me...and not to give me any excuses...thanks, Lis), we measured each other and send our points lists to each other each night.

Last week I had a great exercise week. I exercised every day-including water aerobics, walking, kayaking and paddle boating! It was my first full week. This week... I have exercised twice, but will get in a third time before the week is over. I know there will be good weeks and bad weeks-I hope more good than bad.

The good news is W is doing it with me and we are cooking up a storm of WW recipes. I loved the Chicken Marsala so much, I would order that exact recipe at a restaurant. We also made, cheesy chicken enchiladas, Greek Chicken, egg salad, dry rubbed pork tenderloin, potato salad, and have more plans for new recipes next week.

The Chicken Marsala was the best followed by the Greek Chicken and egg salad. I would use less oregano in the Greek chicken next time, I guess that is not one of my favorite spices, but live and learn!

The dry rubbed pork tenderloin...was good tasting, but too much for my sensitive stomach to handle...I probably lost another pound after that meal though...

The potato salad was more of a German potato salad, I liked it, but will edit the recipe next time.

We learned how to use REAL garlic...sad we have never cooked with it before, nor scallions...I KNOW RIGHT? A whole new world.

Overall, I have been doing this two weeks and am down 3 lbs. It will be slow I know, but I hope to never see the numbers on the scale again once I pass them. I also have realized that a structured program is best for me--but one with flexibility.

The online system is great. You can go into any recipe, change it and it will tell you how many points it is! You can add your own recipe to find out how many points that is as well...seriously, it is magic! Also, everyone gets 35 "splurge" points a week. So you can have what you want one day a week, or have a few extra points each day. Flexibility is the key to my success. I hope.

I know it will be a hard road, but I have been overweight for 13 years now and it is beyond time to take it seriously. Lis gave me a food scale, DTC promises me an in purse point counter...W is cooking recipes with me and eating healthy. What more could I ask for?

Wish me luck. I have some trips coming up and know they will be challenging, but none more that the Warner Family Camp out! All my lifetime favorite recipes...

I will need strength. Time will tell if I have it. I guess my epiphany is that my feelings of failure by not being able to do it by myself aren't doing anything for me. By NOT trying WW, I will never know if it is what will work for me. It isn't a failure to ask for help, I am a trained therapist for God's sake-you would think I would be open to anything...

The truth is it is complicated. I feel better about myself now then I did when I was skinny and not eating. I am happy in my life, but not with my weight and health. So, join me on my journey and wish me luck.

I am worried about failing at Weight Watchers...then I will have really failed! But, I am working on affirming the positive and giving myself a break. I have failed at getting healthy by myself, but it doesn't make me a failure. I am a true failure if I don't try. I know that. I am trying. Bring it!

Five Good Things, Five Bad

2009-05-11T10:42:00.007-04:00

Good things this weekend:
1. Graduation Ceremonies
2. Dinner at the River House Inn, Williamston
3. Star Trek
4. Bake N Cakes gourmet cupcakes
5. Down 5 pounds

Three Bad things:
1. The weekend is over
2. Dogs continue to track black mud from "lake" in yard through house
3. Front porch falling apart
4. caught in rain going from one grad ceremony to another
5. The word "moist," I just don't like it.

Stupid Healthy Eating and Not So Stupid Living

2009-04-09T16:30:00.005-04:00

So, I am overweight. No shock there. When I went to the Dr. and found I had gained weight I was disgusted at the scale. I am not diabetic, but will again follow a diet balancing protein and carbs (known as the diabetic diet--I used it when I was preggers), eating small, small meals. I am allowed one lunch and one dinner I can be more lenient with per week. I will look forward to those days...

On MPR this morning they were talking about "brown fat" yes, there is a thing we have on our bodies called good fat. It is brown in color and its sole purpose is to burn energy and calories. Guess what? We all have it, those of us who are obese don' t have as much? Is there ANY fairness there? I am just saying. If we are fat-can't we have MORE of the good fat. Seriously?

Also in the news. Obese women have even more of a glass ceiling than thin women...and obese men are over represented at the top of corporations. Although I don't want to run a corporation it is good to know that white women are preferred thin as company heads. There goes my bid for President of the world.

I will keep you posted on my journey. W is doing this with me (thanks). It makes it easier to tackle as a team. My mother sent me a card telling me she was behind me 100% and she knows I can do it. Shit. Now if that doesn't make it real--life has just changed.

I will try to embrace it. . .

Mexico

2009-02-15T22:01:00.007-05:00

I recently went on a family vacation with my mom, my husband's mom, my husband and our two year old daughter.

I wanted to "skip Christmas" and save our money to escape a portion of the Michigan winter. I started researching, talked my mom into coming and then made an appointment with our AAA travel agent, Kathy.

Kathy has always pointed us in the right direction before, so I went with her recommendation of the Azule Sensitori in the Maya Riviera, Mexico. It is an all inclusive resort on the ocean between Playa Del Carmen and Cancun. Everything was included including premium alcohol, which was very important to one traveler, it was family friendly-important to myself, had around the clock room service, important to all, five restaruants, a pool/river that wond around the entire complex and of course, swim up bars--oh and each suite had a hot tub in the room and a balcony.

Sound good? It was fantastic. I wish I would have had another four days to do a few more things locally, but who does not want more time while on vacation. Also, we were on the first floor and you could see under the door. I thought a lizard would crawl in...one never did, however our floors were flooded when the downpour came! :) Nothing is perfect and this is a new resort just opened in November, so I figured we were the 8th family to ever stay there in those connected suites. We were treated like royalty and I found the Mexican people some of the friendliest of anywhere I have travelled. The area we stay in gets 80% of its money from tourism, but that has never stopped people from being rude. In Mexico, the people were fabulous!

Connections

2008-12-29T21:46:00.006-05:00

What makes a connection? Is it things you have in common such as interests? Is it things you have in common such as values? Is it a time and space issue, like we spend so much time together, we bond. Are there connections you make that will never go away, or will they all fade with time. As adults, do you go stick with friends you have a history with or do you make new friends as you change and grow. Is it all of the above?

Have you ever made a soulful connection, but there just is not enough time in the day to spend with that person? These are all questions that I am thinking about lately. Lifelong friends not acknowledging life changes, old friends making you a priority again letting you know what you had mattered. New friends connecting at your soul, but life not allowing for the connection to grow. People you feel were friends, but they just don't have room for you any more or friends you had before kids, don't relate to your new priorities. The deal is relationships take work. I choose to put energy in to those who wish to return the energy and let things go that are beyond my ability to change them.

I will continue to put out the positive energy I feel and see where life takes me. One thing I know for sure is that I will never take for granted those who have given me so much throughout the years. Those who have loved me for who I am no matter what else is going on. Those who accepted me in whatever state I was in, fat, thin, married, single, with or without child, happy or sad, working or searching. Thank you for reminding me not to accept anything less that the highest quality of friend. Thank you for showing me what that is.

Haiden Withdrawl

2008-12-29T11:31:00.005-05:00

Since I had five days home with my baby (well, she is two now) girl, I miss her today.

I just talked to her on the phone, she is at Grandma's. The conversation went something like this...

"Hi, I am having fun," said Haiden.

"Good, are you being good for Grandma?" I asked.

"yeah, I am getting ready to go to sleep." She said.

"Are you tired?" I asked.

"Yeah, can I see you when you wake up?" She asked.

My heart melted.

"Mommy will see you after work," I said.

"I love you Mommy."

"I love you too, sweat pea."

Grandma went back to reading her stories. Seriously, how did I get so lucky? My daughter is very happy, very verbal and has a spirit that shines right through that cute little gap in her two front teeth. I am a lucky woman.

They say write down all the cute things they say or you might forget. So, I am going to start writing.

Christmas/Holiday Cards

2008-12-16T22:37:00.004-05:00

So, here is the deal. We ran out of Christmas cards...big family and we've moved a lot...so big list....If you are reading this HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

I thought of you...

Snow. . . It's coming now.

2008-12-16T22:31:00.004-05:00

Yeah, it is winter now. Just saying.

Love Actually

2008-12-14T21:37:00.005-05:00

I have so much love for my life partner. I enjoy laughing with him and sharing time together. Sometimes, there are special moments that remind me of the early days. I am remind me of the initial connection that we have built upon. Those moments are just...well...fantastic! I feel lucky to have love actually.

Say What?!

2008-12-14T21:26:00.005-05:00

I had a great weekend filled with friends.

First, I had a college years reunion with two girl friends, both of whom were in our wedding eleven years ago. It was nice to hang out with such ease. Even if C cancelled, last minute. We still had a great time...and I expect him to come through with that making it up to us :).

Second, Wayne and I went to the MSU game with two of the most fabulous people on earth and had a great dinner at Red Lobster...seeing how few people were there was odd...my guess is due to the economy. But the game and the company rocked! Mom was a free sitter, can't beat that either.

Third, we took Haidie to an otherwise all adult gathering at the Smite's. Nice to see many of our friends and hang out eating some great homemade soups and goodies, playing games that make me laugh! Haidie was great and Wayne was a champ allowing me to have fun!

This time of year people you love are important. I find myself missing my late Grandmother very much. I also miss my military family, Dave, Heather, Mo, Mark, John, Michelle, Nick, Jen, Brian, the kids...and many, many more. I miss them all so much and have the greatest memories we have all shared together during holiday's past. As I spend time with my local friends and family...I can't help but to miss my "away" friends so much. Love to you all...

Random Thoughts-Time and Shirley MacClain

2008-12-10T08:51:00.007-05:00

Time: I heard that 10:10 pm is the best time to be creative and to solve problems. I have also heard that the shower produces a zen like effect to assist in a meditative like state for creativity and thoughts to flow. So, I ask you this...since my clock in my bathroom is stuck at 10:10, does that in itself mean that I will always be creatively thinking when I am in the shower?

Second thought...totally unrelated.

Shriley? I was people watching as I often do and realized that I am not just a "chipper gal" who likes to spread cheer. When entering the building every morning, for example, I can't help to say, "Good morning," to the sleepy student working the front desk or the facilities staff carefully de-icing the sidewalks after the machine did a so-so job. I can't help but to make small talk on the elevator or thank someone out loud for holding a door open for me. I can't resist chatting it up with the students and staff I see daily in the cafeteria. As I watch others, most are not inclined to communicate with some of these folks. It is not that they are rude individuals. I'll back up a bit, let's take the student working the door of the cafeteria. When you enter the cafeteria, there is a student that slides other students cards through for entry, takes cash for those paying as one time guests or collects tickets from those of us who get them through working at Case Hall. That is her/his job. Day after day, person after person -- and we are talking about thousands of students per day handling everyone who enters. Ok, back go my observation of the non talkers. Some have their ipods on and just going through the motions of their day not to acknowledge or ignore, just to be. Some are talking with the people they will sit with for lunch. Some look like they have a hang over and are glad to be able to walk--an all-nighter look at least. Some seem inconvenienced to have to wait five seconds if there is a line, and then there are a few who know the student worker and shout out the good ole' "what up?"-but not really looking for a response. There are a few people that acknowledge the student doing their job and divert the energy of the assembly line process. I am one of these people. For me, it is not that I can't shut up--as I know many of you are thinking...although it is a fair thought, based on my affinity to chatter. It is that I can't ignore the energy I feel while in the presence of others. It is not just following customs and courtesies like I am sure some of the other greeters follow. It is deliberate. It is important to me. It is an organic push to connect with the other energy, to acknowledge the space and time we share and to respect the presence as a life form rather than the task handler of an assembly line process. Now, I know this sounds like I have been reading some Shirley MacClain books or something, but alas, no. I just realized as I shook a student out of their daze this morning into a shock because someone spoke to them and there was a five second delay in the students response of "good morning?" that the greeting was not typical. I am sure others of you are thinking...leave them alone, let them be sleepy and dazed- you are probably driving them crazy! But, I don't get this sense. I don't stop and have a half hour conversation when they are clearly fighting to stay awake, I simply say, "good morning," "Stay warm," "Have a great night." or some such greeting. The response I feel is energy awakening, momentary connectivity and real time interaction.

Those are my thoughts for today. Feel free to comment...so in the moment I am reading the comments, we are connected-as is our energy...(I couldn't resist to add this piece!). Maybe I should read some Shirely MacClain... :)

I thought Santa was supposed to be a jolly old fella

2008-12-08T10:28:00.005-05:00

He does exist! Although he seems a bit, uh, grumpy. I was told in story after story that Santa was a jolly old fella. Well? This is my evidence to the contrary...

As you can see when Haiden was 3 months, she starred at the design on the carpet...at 1 year three months she was petrified of him when he spoke (she wasn't too fond of men at the time), and this year she did much better.

Look how much bigger she is...they grow so fast. I know everyone says that and I see her everyday and don't notice it as much. When I look back at pictures, I wonder, where did my little baby go? Well, she is a toddler now and knows what Christmas is. When Santa asked her what she wanted for Christmas, she replied, "a house." He gave her a little ball. She slid off his lap and gave him a high five. She went back twice to thank him...she REALLY liked the ball. What fun it is to see the holidays through the eyes of a child. And...she had on a slammin' outfit, don't you think?

Dinner. No nutrition included.

2008-11-20T08:47:00.005-05:00

It is on a rare occasion when I find myself swept away by the food at a basket ball game. Last night I did. A hot dog, which I do not wish to know what is in it, how it is made, what the food handling issues are, etc. I just wanted to put some catsup (I prefer it over the spelling of ketchup) on it and eat it. I did. I was great. Wayne made a different choice, a chicken caesar pita. Good for him. However, he didn't want the Lays, how could I let them waste? I couldn't...plus, they go so well with a dog. Then, I had a chocolate chip cookie. Otis Spunkmeyer. My favorite. Wayne was going back for more at the half, I said I didn't want anything further. Good choice I say! He brought back a soft pretzel with cheese. Well, not real cheese I am sure, I even wonder if it was real cheese product. Either way, cheesy goodness on a soft pretzel shared by two. Then he said, here, I know you love Otis Spunkmeyer cookies, so I thought I would share. Did he not notice I already had one? Well, who can turn down sharing...so a second chocolate chip cookie I had... I drank water....uh, does that help? I don't know what it is, but a game just doesn't seem complete without some stadium eats. We won by the way! DEEEEE-TRIOT BA-SKET-BALL! Sleep deprivation and all, it was a good game and a great time!

A Lot on My Mind - Politics and Keeping It Real

2008-11-06T21:48:00.006-05:00

I was watching an interview with Bill Clinton. He had a very realistic view on voting. He said some people are one issue voters-like pro-lifers for example, some would vote for McCain because he had a female running mate-regardless of their politics. Some people vote along party lines. Some people would vote for Obama because he was black. Some would vote McCain because he was a veteran. Some people would vote for the best of the two. Voting is an emotional issue. It is not a rational issue. It is not black and white (no pun intended). That is why it is so hard to understand.

That is where politics come in. I was thinking about something a friend said. She said it was hard to be happy when a minority candidate was not supportive enough for gay rights. I heard that both our liberal and conservative candidates said they did not believe in gay marriage. Obama more inclusive, but not going there all the way. I also think about the last election when gay marriage was a key issue and some pundits believe the "family values" crowd AKA those against gay marriage came out in herds just to keep gay marriage off the ballot. What is the answer? How does one reconcile extreme happiness and disappointment?

I feel Roe V. Wade won't get flipped. I feel ecstatic. I feel peace will have more of a chance and my brothers and sisters in uniform will be safer, but not pulled home because it is too complicated. That gives me mixed emotions. I feel an extreme connection to Obama and his life story. I feel hope for minorities in this country--especially the young who can see something different-something attainable. I still feel like we have such a mess to handle, it will be a very difficult job. So when I put my full support behind our president am I short changing gays and non-Christians and selling out or rather being exclusive in a group that promotes its all inclusiveness? I am not sure what the answer is. I feel like it will take me a while to wrap my brain around it all.

I feel optimistic, and then I feel guilty. I feel that my soul has a chance and I feel I have some soul searching to do. Does the good outweigh the bad? I say yes. Is it enough? I hope so. Can I do more? I can. Will I? I will. Will that be enough? I don't know. I feel alienating the non-christian or gay people in our country is not as inclusive as I feel it should be. I will keep thinking...and listening...and loving the fact that I have people in my life that keep me thinking and exploring.

My Inspiration

2008-11-05T20:50:00.003-05:00

The election is over. I have been moved by many things, but none more than my mother. She found her voice in life after many years of quieting herself for the perceived benefit of her family. She did what she thought she had to do. She endured. When I was about 16 she really began to find her voice and by the time I was 18 she heard it too.

She has worked tirelessly to stand up and be heard. She has worked on behalf of those who are often quieted. I see the connection. I feel inspired. My mom was raised in a small town on a farm. Last week she was walking miles and miles for hours and hours, literally, in one of the worst areas of Flint, MI to make sure that EVERY person knew their rights, their polling place and their worth. She was often paired up with people more than half her age and she kept on going. She was stopped in a neighborhood and asked what she was doing there. She told them, their eyes and spirits met. That is what mattered. My mom sees people for who they are beyond the exterior in a way that people respond to. She saw devastation from industry that no longer exists in a neighborhood demolished, partially burnt down and ravaged by the circumstance of loosing a factory in what was once a middle class working neighborhood.

My mom is tough. Dedicated. Hard working. Motivated. Courageous. She is the epitome of what is happening everywhere. She is working to bring people together. She worked for her job and then on her own on every one of her days off for the past several months to work toward hope. Hope in elections big and small and proposals popular and unpopular. She walked the streets of Meridian Township, she walked the streets of Flint. She walked in the sun, she walked in the rain. She had doors slammed in her face, she was greeted with anger and she kept on going. She knew that if one person was informed, touched or motivated it was worth it. She was also greeted with hope, which kept her going. She had strangers over to her house to make calls to get out the vote. Strangers with a common cause-which of course bonded them beyond knowing each other personally, but rather knowing each others commitment and values. She did the things that many people are intimidated to do and she did it without complaint and with determination.

I have hope. Thanks mom. She doesn't read blogs, she doesn't get putting all of your feelings out-especially to strangers...but the funny thing is that is what she does in person every day she empowers someone else or is there to hear them. We are more alike than different. I owe my mom a lot. She continues to inspire me. Her passion is contagious. Congratulations to my mom. She was a part of the success being felt by the majority of this country and it couldn't be done with out people like her. I couldn't be me without her either. Words can't express my thanks I hope my actions do.

Buttery Goodness

2008-11-03T21:04:00.006-05:00

Today, I went with Wayne and my Father-in-law to Frankenmuth. What a comforting day. A trip to the outlet mall (insert some shopping), the largest Christmas store in the world (you just can't be in a bad mood there), my FIL purchasing a $500 coo coo clock (and the clock is...just kidding, just kidding-ther is history and a story behind it. To each their own.), and then sum it up with chicken and buttery noodles. Please, I think I need say no more. Oh yes I do. The mashed potatoes, how do they perfect them? The Bavarian Inn is my favorite. I feel Zhender's and the BI's food is similar in taste, but the atmosphere at the BI is so much better. Ahhhhh, buttery goodness. Just what I needed to start my week. Did I mention there was butter involved?

It's Sock Weather

2008-10-17T08:56:00.016-04:00

So, the truth is, I am in a mourning period. This morning when I was getting ready to take my little one to daycare, my little helper brought me my flip flops. Clearly she was reading my mind, because, they would be my shoe of choice. I didn't have socks on, went outside and the reality hit me like hammer to the head...or feet in this case. It is sock weather.

Sock weather. Do you know what is followed by socks? Coats, hats, scarfs, gloves...cold. Dark. Winter. Dark when you leave for work, dark when you return. Less sunlight, less vitamin D, less warmth.

I think what I will enjoy least is the extra time it takes to get ready. I love just throwing on sandals and bopping out the door with reckless abandon. (what a rebel I am.)

Now, there will have to be coordination, socks that match things, shoes with laces or boots with zippers, stuffing my wiggly child into snow gear. . . all the things that will require an earlier wake up time. Let's face it. THIS is the true fear. I will have to get up earlier, plan more and it will take longer to drive, thus forcing my non-morning self to spend more waking hours in what I feel should be mandatory sleep time hours.

It's sock weather. I'll adjust, but for this moment...I mourn. I will save money on pedicures. Ah, a glimmer of good.

Goodbye sandals.

On oade to sandals:

Public Radio Anyone?

2008-10-15T16:36:00.003-04:00

So, I love MPR, WKAR Public Radio...I really am "over" other radio stations for the most part, and listen to MPR. I was listening today and at the end of a segment, the reporter will say, "For WKAR East Lansing, I am Joe Smith." As their by line. Very interesting. The different shows have different by lines representing their title, like, "For All Things Considered, I am Jane Doe." But today, it struck me as I was driving back from Onondaga for work, that there was a stroke of genius one day in a marketing meeting...or a stroke of idealism, or a VERY INFLATED SENSE OF SELF perhaps. Whatever the reason, I would love to do a piece. The show is called The World. Can't you just hear it now... "For The World, I am Jaimie Hutchison." Quite some ring to that, eh? I bet that never gets old. Great marketing... "For It's Just Not The Jaim Without Me, I am Jaimie Hutchison." (It just not the same ring as "For The World, I am Jaimie Hutchison!")

Toronto Fun

2008-10-09T19:31:00.003-04:00

Top 10 Things I Learned on a trip to Toronto, Canada with Five Friends:

10. 14 hours in the car...you learn a lot about each other--or sleep? Both good options.
9. You can have fun doing anything...like a traffic jam...if you have the right company. (Where ya at...ew?
8. There are women who ARE drama free.
7. I love Peach Blossoms...
6. Phrases can be repeated over and over and they still get laughs...you betcha.
5. Canadians know way more about our politics than I know about theirs...sorry.
4. Most people DO snore...even...
3. Six women can sit quietly when there is fantastic food on the table.
2. Amsterdam is an interesting place too......
1. I am lucky.

It's Official No Talking About Politics At Work

2008-10-07T15:03:00.021-04:00

The official memo came out today about not discussing politics at work or on work time.

"Refrain from public displays of positions and candidates on agency property and time. This includes materials as well as use of email." This is a good policy. It makes sense that we work while at work and not create any strain between co-workers. A few emails have gone out in the past two weeks, sure to offend some that don't agree with others' positions. I have caught myself saying, "did you watch the debate?" I clearly understand and appreciate the position of the leadership.

However, it got me thinking...

Could I have a picture of a pig with lipstick displayed?

Could I bring in a Pit bull?-- What if it has a hockey mask on?

Can I talk about the fact that we can't talk about politics--or would the mention of politics then be talking about politics?

Can I mention that when I was in Toronto this weekend, I could see Russia from the CN Tower?

Can I mention that I prayed for a pipeline last night?

Can I discuss things related to politics, like the economy. For instance a co-worker of mine was looking at an agency bookshelf and made a statement about a book titled Working with the Poor. She said, "Can we re title this book Working with Each Other or Working amongst, for and with the Poor?" Clearly a statement about the economy, but the economy is the leading issue voters are concerned about.

Can I mention I met a guy named Joe Six Pack?

Can I talk about change?

Can I talk about the elderly, people of color, women in positions of power, sexism, racism... OK... and ageism?

Alas, my brain spin from all of the "what ifs" took at least five minutes.

Should I stay five minutes later? I will.

In all seriousness, I get it. I sent the director an email and asked if this policy included buttons on purses, coats, etc. He said "I think the best rule of thumb is to what extent clients and colleagues would be exposed to that in the workplace, don’t you? If your coat or purse is out of view, I don’t think it’s a big deal. We don’t want this to become paralyzing."

I think that is a fair statement, but now I am thinking about my purse. My purse is very big and I wear my coat inside. Maybe I could take a note from the the NBA's old rule where players used to have band aides over their tattoos. I could cover my button with black tape and untape it after work. I will try that and let you know how it goes. You betcha I will.

Oh, the leadership at Horse and Cart also attached a fascinating article about the study of a writer's intent displayed in emails. So, the advice of the article is if you meant it seriously, read it as if you were reading it from the position of sarcasm and if you meant it sarcastically, read it from the position of taking it seriously. So, just to clear this up I am having fun with my thoughts and the leadership thinks its great they finally made my blog. Glad to have a good bunch around here!

One final note: the term "rule of thumb" was popularized by early laws that a man could beat his wife but only with a switch (stick) smaller than the width of his thumb, TA-DA! "Rule of thumb" was born.

Okay guys and gals, you all have a good day now! I will, you betcha ;). (I hope Runs with Spatula, Shae on line, Diaper, my favorite undecided and Hugs with Heart enjoy that last line...it was just for them.)

The Amazing Race Starts Tonight...

2008-09-28T20:03:00.001-04:00

So I had a full and fabulous weekend and was going to blog about it, but I am compelled to watch the Amazing Race. . . Yep. It makes me want to travel! I now am signing off to watch...

Great weekend though!

Too Tired...I'm with Seinfeld

2008-09-23T22:21:00.008-04:00

I agree with Jerry Seinfeld that the remote control finger must be the last thing to fall asleep...but I must update the bit a bit. He says, when you are very tired, you fight it to watch TV. GO TO BED, stop searching for entertainment when you are so tired you are just scanning channels. Entertain me, you must think. Entertain me.

Well, I blog when I am so tired I could....... Oh, sorry...... fall asleep. So, not only do I believe the finger that operates the remote control is the last to fall asleep, but I say all the fingers are the last things on your body to fall asleep. Case and point. I am writing this.

Oh, side note: I hear employers check your facebook and follow links to your blog, so--ahem, " Jaimie would be a great employee. She is dedicated, smart and hardworking. Any employer would be glad to have her positive energy around." --anonymous (or me....too hard of a sell?)

OK, off to sleep so I can have all the energy I need for work tomorrow *wink.

She Smiled

2008-09-19T09:02:00.013-04:00

She smiled...

Our first family photo...

Wayne and I went into Haiden's bedroom this morning and sang our best version of Happy Birthday. She just looked at us and smiled, and smiled and smiled. We explained to her that she was two today. We told her it was her birthday. I put her in a sweet long dress with leggings and sent her to see her friends at daycare with some Rice Crispie treats her Daddy made for her and her friends.

The day it all began...

Two years ago today my life changed. New love came flooding in like the waters of Niagara. She looked at me and starred longingly as I sang to her that first day. Her dark thick hair was beautiful and reflective of her Brazilian heritage. Her sparkling blue eyes had something more behind them. A knowing. A knowing of who we were. She now has light brown hair and hazel eyes...just like her Mommy. She knows her alphabet and sings along with me now. She is fascinated by the Wiggles and Sesame Street characters, although TV is limited in our house...somehow, she knows every character! Her hugs feel like the warmth of the sun encasing my body. Her smiles and laugh give me the purest of joy. Even her new phrase, "no, I can't" warms my heart! The way she says I love you fills my world with every breath.

I remember her first big girl bath!

These two years have been among the best of my life. When things happen that make me question my health, all I can do is think that I must stay around to be present. I purposefully plan the activities of my life to be my best self for her. She deserves the best I have to offer.

Her first Birthday!

Yes, we did this to her last Halloween!

18 months! She finally started walking. We were so proud!

Who could have ever imagined that my college sweetheart and I would create someone so spectacular. I only wished that every child was loved and treasured as much as our little peanut. Thank you Wayne for showing me that we can do anything together. We are the best of the best of teams. You are the kindest, most caring, joyful and active father, the best father I know and I can't imagine this journey without you

I love you Wayne. I love you Haiden. I feel so full of love today.

happiness.

Monday Weirdness? I am seeing spots...well, spot.

2008-09-15T15:32:00.006-04:00

About half way through my third client I noticed I was seeing spots...well, spot. It was distracting, like I had something stuck in my eye. There is a weird arrow head shaped spot on everything I see, well rather whatever I am looking at has an area, shaped like an arrow head that I can't see. I have no other symptoms of anything and just keep thinking it should go away. I take a lot of pictures, and it is kind of like when you have the flash go off in your eyes over and over, except it has been constant over the last three and a half hours...Monday weirdness. I just checked...it is there if the eye is open or closed...just wondering about it... Where oh where did this weird spot come from and how do I get it to go away?

Experiment-The Odyssey? We will see.

2008-09-11T15:48:00.004-04:00

My van, named Smurfy, is new to me. I don't know her all that well yet. She provides comfort and all of the things you would want in a mini van. My daughter calls her "the new van." and is so thrilled every time she rides in it (as in comparison to the 1997 Honda Civic). Today, Smurfy gave me a new message...she flashed her empty tank light at me. She says she is empty. In my glove box, the book says I can drive her up to 40 miles with that light on. Did you catch that..."UP TO" 40 miles. I have been all around town today with that fancy light lit. Do you think I will make it home? That will be the experiment...the odyssey...Friends, please have cell phones ready, I want to test this "up to" part. :) And you all thought I was so sqaure.

Conference Let Down

2008-09-11T08:37:00.007-04:00

My husband's new job has sent him to conferences at wonderful hotels and in wonderful cities. He just spent a week in Philadelphia and while he was eating cheese steak and Rita's Italian Ice...I went to a conference of my own. Right here in Lansing, MI.

I went to the 7th Annual Substance Abuse Conference this Monday and Tuesday at the Lansing Center. As far as conferences go, it was mediocre at best. There were a few presenters that I could have listened to all day long, but the rest left me wondering...what was going on? I think I should submit to a conference someday. Certainly I could put something together that was better than much of what I heard. Many of the presenters were presenting in a hour and a half what they usually present in a day, or in two days...and they didn't modify the handouts. SO, when you go to a training and get the warm up and get through about 4 pages of a 12 page handout it leaves you....well, disappointed. I believe all of the presenters were experts in their field. It was a relatively inexpensive conference, but couldn't the presenters modify their materials for the time frames allotted? I don't know if they were paid or not, but come on! Alas, the answer was evidently no they could not modify for the time allotted. The food was the most horrible food I have had at a conference (and don't forget I have lived in four states). The eggs didn't even taste like eggs, the hash browns were mush and the lunch was so awful that the next day I was left with the Hmmmmm, what to do, what to do? feeling. The conference fee pays for meals, so do you stay and eat the mush, or try to wonder out on your own? A-HA! Right out the window of the Lansing Center was the Knight Cap. I asked one of my coworkers if she wanted to join me across the street. She quickly responded "YES!" she could not handle another conference meal. What a good choice. I have never been there and hear it is a great dinner place. It is a great lunch place too! Two of my coworkers had crab cake sandwich with chicken gumbo soup and they both raved about it. I had a good 'ol burger. Who knew a burger could taste SO good! Overall, it was nice to go to a conference for a few days and have a break from the everyday, but I don't ever wish to eat at the Lansing Center again. OH! I did have one good meal there. . . breakfast was from 730 - 830. When I arrived at 8 all the food was gone except Rice Crispies. Snap Crackle Pop! They were nice enough to find me some milk...and I must say it is a fine facility and the Lansing Center Staff were nice as well. Next time I go to a conference in town, I will shoot for the Kellogg Center! The food there is outstanding! Upon quickly reflecting on my last statement I ask, should I really decide on what conference I go to due to the food? LOL!

Making the Rounds

2008-09-01T20:18:00.016-04:00

It was a long weekend, the last weekend of summer, all of the things that make us Michiganians ponder the five or so months that we will be huddled up in our caves avoiding the flecks of white that will soon fall...yes sooner than we would like.

So, my second trip north this week was to make the rounds and see some of my dearest family members. My Grandpa W, my Grandma D, and my newest nephew. I also got to see Liz, my brother Chris, my pops, my mom and my niece.

Haiden, Wayne, Liz, Will, Mom, Gramps, Desi and Chris on the farm

I learned some things.

1. Cows MOO much louder than I thought.

My Grandpa W., Paris, MI is a life long farmer. Even though he had other professions and callings, paratrooper, prisoner of war, factory worker, father, husband and Grandfather he has always kept his roots. He has always farmed along with whatever he was doing, aside from his time in WWII. My Grandfather just called "Boooossss" and the bull came down with all of the other cows following. Haiden and my niece, Desi wanted to see them up close, so Grandpa called them down. Who knew cows were SO loud. I have been around and on farms my whole life, but this was new to me. Even Haiden's impression of a cow now has more personality and volume! I wonder if the different tones and volumes are communication like whales...hmmmm...

Desi feeding one of the loud MOOers that Grandpa called in.

2. The spunk in my jeans are strong.

My Grandma D., 91 now is so spunky. She has humor, wit and a smile and zest for life that is unforgettable. She lived alone up until earlier this year when she had a fall and nearly died. The rehab hospital wanted to keep her and said she was too weak to go home. Oh, she went home. My Aunt now stays with her to help her out a little. My Grandma D. met us for breakfast and didn't even need her walker. Her hair and make up were done and she was a trip as usual. How lucky I am to have her in my life.

Grandma (note: no walker), Haiden and I at breakfast.

3. Boys are different than girls!

Although this is not a new or unique observation, I was reminded of this. I saw my Brother, his partner Liz and their son William. Will is a boy. He is 17 months and never stops moving, one thing to the next, to the next. What a cutie. He flashes that smile and just charms you. What a doll. He has all of Liz's coloring and eyes and the rest is like a little Chris.

My brother Chris, me, Will, and Liz

Will- go, go, going...

4. My Mom is fabulous.

My Mom is a very dedicated Mother and Grandmother. She is a full time employee in a very demanding job and goes above and beyond the call of duty to do whatever she can to bring family together, to bring my brother's children up north to see him and to provide a welcoming and loving spirit. I appreciate her very much. Earlier today, she said, " I am becoming my mother." I was joking with her because she had one bite on her plate and said, " I just can't eat that last bite." She said my Grandmother used to say that all the time. So, she made the comment. She embodies all of the things about my Grandmother that made her so special. My Grandma would be proud and inspired at the Grandmother my mother is.

My fab Mom in green feeding the fish for Haiden to see and Wayne and Haiden looking at the fish...and a few random people that were at the fish pond.

I am writing today feeling loved and happy to have made the trip around up north and so happy that Wayne and Haiden are a part of my family that continue to allow me to count my blessings. What a team the three of us are. With all of the moving parts, hours on the road and people to see it could have just been rushed, but I savored every moment. Much thanks to them.

Change is Good

2008-08-29T09:41:00.007-04:00

I heard one of the best speeches of my life last night. I feel inspired to write, talk and think about it. I even have it on my DVR in case anyone missed it. I feel I am a good judge of character. Character is important to me. I BELIEVE in Obama. I BELIEVE he has the country's best interest at heart. I also know he has what it takes to lead us. I believe his message of change is not only a message, but a necessity. My soul aches at the bigotry some in this country hold. My brain aches for the minds that are sealed shut by spin masters. If you vote for McCain because you stand behind his philosophical beliefs and ideas about how to effectively run this country then vote McCain. If you feel like you want something different than the last eight years, vote Obama.

I feel Obama's message for change is more than a message. It is an action plan. An action plan that will allow this country to regain its footing in each individual home (even all seven of McCain's :)) and in the world. We can not underestimate the footprint that has been left on this country by the Bush administration. We have to listen, compromise, and change how we move forward. The financial hole we are in, I believe, will take more than 4 years to claw out of. But, we must start. The dreams I have for my daughter depend on it. The dreams I have for my later years in life depend on it. The care I want for my parents as they age depend on it. This is not an election that can be taken lightly. We must not stay the course, we must begin to correct the errors made in the past eight years.

What a beautiful family Obama has. I would be a proud, proud American with the Obama family being our first family. When I read Obama's first book I was moved to tears several times. Why? Because I could relate to his stories. Because I could hear and feel his development as a human being. All inclusive development that included the development of his intellect, soul, compassion and drive for a better tomorrow. Wouldn't it be nice if we could have someone leading us who represents and understands our real life challenges? I hope Americans listened last night. Although I am a huge Obama supporter this election is about us. US, the American people. I know what is right for me. I don't just feel it, I know it. We can make a change. Yes we can.

An Ode to Runs With Spatula (3 of 3)

2008-08-28T19:34:00.031-04:00

I have a friend who has a fabulous blog, Runs With Spatula. She goes with her partner Corky, friends and family to some fabulous and some not so fabulous restaurants, food stands and fairs. Pretty much anywhere there is food to blog about, she goes. She gives great reviews and takes wonderful pictures. You should check out her blog. She also gives recipies and is herself a fabulous cook. There is a link to her blog on this page.

So, here is my attempt to do a foodie blog...An Ode to Runs With Spatula

Outside the Cheese Shop with my sandwich

Inside the cheese shop

Monday afternoon Anica and I went touring to fish town in Leland. I have heard about the famous Cheese Shop and it's magical sandwiches. Based on my flavor preferences Anica's recommendation to me was the Shipwreck. The Shipwreck is ham, cheddar, lettuce, tomato, cucumber and herb mayo on pretzel bread. A simple sandwich. A very tasty sandwich. Anica and I split the sandwich for a total of just over $5. The Cheese Shop also had a great variety of other sandwiches for any pallet as well as wine and cheese that went on and on. I would highly recommend taking a Cheese Shop sandwich and eat it right on the tables out on the water in Fish Town. My sources say, you must get the pretzel bread. It is what makes the sandwiches special. I thought the pretzel bread was great, I just took a small amount of the salt off of the top and then, perfection!

Half of a Shipwreck (minus a few bites...I almost forgot the picture!)

Onto dinner...

Monday night Anica treated me to one of our all time favorite dishes, pizza. We had a pizza topped with ham, pepperoni and mushrooms. It was from Dick's Pour House in Lake Lelanau. Dick's is one of those up north bars with dear heads and fish adorning the walls. The service was great. ESPECIALLY Adam and Keith. Sean, who was in the kitchen did a great job with the pizza. It was a great pizza and a large three topping pizza will run you $15 (14"). Dick's Pour House is a great place to grab a pizza (the best pizza in the county I hear) in Lelanau County and if Adam or Keith are working, make sure you tip them well.

There would be a picture of the pizza here...but well we ate it :)...use your imagination.

Tuesday after strolling the shops in Sutton's Bay we became hungry for lunch. We walked into Boone's Prime Time Pub where I had the most fabulous grilled chicken sandwich of my life. The chicken was moist and perfectly cooked. There was a small amount of teriyaki sauce on the breast which gave the chicken great flavor, it was served with chips-yet I chose to substitute fries. The fries were a great choice, because I would have been so jealous when Anica's came if I didn't order them! Anica ordered a burger topped with cheese, bacon and mushrooms. The coolest part of the burger is that it came with a full and fabulous condiment tray with mayonnaise, catsup, onions, regular and fancy mustard, some seasoning and something else that escapes me now. She said the burger was good. It was a large burger and they cooked it to her specifications. Our service was good and I would have gotten a great picture of the above mentioned fabulous condiment tray, but we were done with it and the tray was passed on...BUT, I did get this photo of me in the booth, if you look in the lower right hand corner you can see the tray. Very reasonable prices with lunch around $25.00 total.

I also got this picture...

Anica with her giant burger. My sandwich was gone already...but you can see how big her burger was as some of it fell out of the bun. She couldn't even finish it...I didn't have that problem with my chargrilled chicken sandwich.

After some time at another beach and some county touring, we were ready for dinner. We went to Northwest Grill in Sutton's Bay. It is a new restaurant owned by the same owner's as Boone's. The restaurants location is where Cafe' Bliss used to be if you know the area.

Northwest Grill was cute and cozy with an up north feel. A nice selection of favorites very reasonably priced. Anica had an organic peach daiquiri which was the most delicious drink I have tasted in quite some time. For dinner we both had dinner salads with mixed greens. Anica had prime rib, cooked rare to her specification with au jus accompanied by a baked potato with butter. It was so large she took some home for the next day. I had the fried prawns accompanied by a baked potato with butter and sour cream. The prawn's were cooked perfectly and accompanied by a Jagermeister barbecue sauce it sounds horrible, but was zippy and tasty. Although the prawn's were fried, the batter was light and not greasy. Both entrees were delicious and I would definitely recommend a stop by Northwest Grill. The entire meal was only $38.00 for the two of us.

Fried Prawns with baked potato

Anica with Kristen, our fabulous server who gave us A+ service even though we were at the end of her working a double shift. If you go in, ask for Kristen and tip this teacher-to-be well. She is from Flint and came to visit the county, fell in love with it an now calls it home.

PS note to: Runs with Spatula, what is a prawn? tasted like shrimp, what is the difference?

Who Needs a Wind Machine? (2 of 3)

2008-08-28T13:18:00.036-04:00

(Cont. from I love NOT camping)

So, when I was reading the list of things Anica suggested I bring to Leelanau County I saw "Doo-rag, scarf or hat." I laughed and laughed at the vision of myself with a doo-rag. Anica has the greatest face for scarfs and hats and she will attest that I have never- in the 28 years she has known me- looked good in scarf's or hats. I do understand the need for me to wear one in the sun, etc. so I brought a visor and a hat.

This may be the best I ever looked in a hat! I think I was a Sophomore and Anica a Freshman in this photo shoot. LOL, Anica's hair was a bit too big to even rock that hat.

Here I am wearing one of Anica's scarfs...as you see, not much luck here either. I had just graduated high school, 1992.

OK, enough of the trip down memory lane and back to the trip to Leelanau County. I did bring a visor and a hat, but alas, the day we were at the beach and the wind was blowing...

I left my hat in the car. Anica, where are you? Oh, there you are under my hair!

We joked that my hair looked like it was stuck in a wind machine like the models use. However, as you see, it did not look flowing and beautiful like when the pros do it.

Here is what it should look like.

Brook Shields and Tyra have had decades to work that wind machine. In my case...

We had to do something about that hair in Anica's face! So, I decided to wear my sunglasses on my head like a headband. Surely that would work, right?

Note: my hair is still blowing directly in Anica's face. "I have a doo-rag in my backpack," said Anica. "Wow! This should be great, we have to get some pictures of THIS!" I replied.

Attempt number one.

First attempt...Hmmmmm...something is wrong. Someone already has this look. Yep, that's it. I totally look like Rosie O'Donnel! Nothing against Rosie, but uh, not my look! So, I think back to how Anica wore the scarf the day before.

It was pushed further back. Pretty as a picture. OK, maybe that will work. Let me try it...

Now I look like a house keeper-maybe a painter. I look like I am trying to hide a mullet or something! I have to try one more time. Maybe more like a headband.

Well, that is the best I got. Note to self: bring pony tail holder, barrette, or hat to the beach next time, or, just don't take pictures and hope no one notices. :)

Aside from Anica, here are some doo-rags that work:

Babies can pull anything off...

Performers...

And even animals...

Hey....does this one look familiar? Oh, I crack myself up! I think the time off has driven me to entertain myself. Hope someone out there shares my giggles. :)

I Love Not Camping (1 of 3)

2008-08-27T16:33:00.013-04:00

We saw this bag at a shop in Sutton's Bay called The Happy Woman, and I knew it was a blog in the making! I LOVE NOT CAMPING!

My room with a view was perfect. I love NOT camping! I had a great time with my oldest friend (duration (28 years), not age), Anica on our NOT camping adventure. It was short, but it was sweet.

Anica and I in the lake at Van's Beach.

The Whaleback Inn

We stayed at the Whaleback Inn in Leland, MI. I have heard about "the county" for SO long. Like seven years long. I finally got to see what all the fuss was about. The water is beautiful. The beaches are killer, Sutton's Bay and Leland had great places to eat shop and wander. The landscape is fabulous, the sunsets are marvelous and the people were welcoming. Overall a beautiful experience. I got all of the great things about camping-like s'mores-without actually camping. PLUS, we had beds, air conditioning, a shower... :)

My favorite moment of not camping, was Anica singing by the campfire while I was roasting marshmallows for my patented "double" s'more. Two marshmallows, a full square of chocolate and two gram crackers. The stars were so bright, the weather was perfect and hearing her voice takes me to a place nothing else does.

I was thrilled to meet in person some of the fabulous characters I feel I know so much about...after all the stories and pictures over the years! I look forward to spending more time with them the next time I visit.

Since I hurt my back unpacking my van (I know, right?) we did the less strenuous outings. I look forward to hiking Whaleback and spending a day at Northbar on one of my next visits.

Cheers to the sun, the water, the waves and "the county."

The Responsible Runaway

2008-08-22T22:17:00.006-04:00

I will start by saying I am very privileged in my life. I have a family that I love, a unique cast of characters that keep me smiling that I call friends, an eleven year marriage, a job that makes an impact on some of our most at risk teen community members, active involvement with community organizations...exactly. I am blessed. I am also exhausted.

I firmly believe that to take care of anyone, my husband, my clients, my child, my family, I must first take care of myself. Lately, I have had some stress in my life, health issues, family issues, relationship issues, job issues, etc. that have frankly, tested me. They have added up. So, I am running away, responsibly.

Top Five Signs I Want (and Need) To Runaway

5. I had the urge to bite the head off of someone at work who I let get under my skin with their issues. I am known as a positive, rapport building, team member. This urge, although I did not act on it, was a sign, a sign of stress.

4. Being overly tired no matter how much sleep I got. Calling in sick and sleeping until 1pm. Sign of stress.

3. Skipping water aerobics to sit. I have been actively going since January, and I blew it off. Sign of stress.

2. I could cry at the drop of a hat. Sign of stress, oooooooooooor watching too much Oprah, but, since they have all been reruns, I deducted it was a sign of stress.

1. Walking out of the restaurant when I was having lunch with my husband because he had the nerve to talk with his mouth full (I asked him not to once already), a sign of stress...it was just a little piece of tortilla. I didn't look back and left him sitting there.

SO, this is what brings me to blog today. I decided on Thursday that I needed a get away. Something without anyone expecting anything of me. No husband, no fabulous child, just me. So, I was feeling impulsive. I am not insane though, so I put out some feelers, made some phone calls and by the end of Thursday, my last scheduled working day for the week, I had gotten approval to take the following week off. By the end of Thursday night, I had a room with a view booked for myself in Northern MI to reset, relax and reflect the following Monday and Tuesday. I am now looking forward to a week off filled with a few road trips, the first by myself the second with my family. A few days to do nothing but a Dr.'s check up and uh, that is it. I am looking forward to what I will forever more call - wait for it - wait for it - (insert sound effect here) PLANNED SPONTANEITY.

Again, I feel blessed that my husband was in full support of whatever I felt would be beneficial...and if you reread my number one reason for the responsible running away, you might not blame the man.

Cheers to the water, the wind and all that I will encounter on my adventure. I feel pretty euphoric just getting all my ducks in a row at work, cancelling the few clients that did want to meet next week (as it is the week before school, my client's want a break too.). I asked for what I wanted and needed. My boss was in full support, my husband in full support, my daughter well cared for and for me...some me time. I really don't think you can underestimate your own piece of mind, mental health, stress level, or whatever you want to call it. As a mental health professional. I am following the advice I would give anyone else! What helped me get this me time?

There is this lady known around Donkey and Kart as "the short lady." She will probably never read this because she self reports that her she lives a blog free life, but if she does, I hope she knows how much her calm, sense of humor and compassion have helped me to feel connected and grounded. She has helped me to make sense of my life by relating. A soul mate of sorts, a connection for sure.

There is another lady, we will give her a Native American second name, she will be called: Hugs with Heart. Hugs with Heart has sent emails, given hugs and brought a connection to my life that was defiantly missing. I think she will read this blog. She is a confident and strong woman, I hope she knows how much I appreciate her support. She is beyond a fabulous friend. She has said words to me that mean more than I can say. Funny emails, allowing me to be real with her and providing so much laughter that I just could just squeal with glee. WOW, what a stress relief a good laugh can be.

The third weird appreciation shout out that I seem to be doing--random! Goes to my family. My husband particularly. Anything in life that is worth it - takes work. A marriage that has fulfillment, fun, support and duration also has crazy days. It is getting through the crazy days and looking back at them with a laugh or a smile, or a lesson learned that make this relationship work for the long haul. I am so glad we have each other. My life is simply better with you in it.

How lucky I am to have: Wayne, Haiden, Leisa, Carrie, Felicity, Amy, Mom, Dad, Anica, Chip, Sheryl, Erin, Matt, Sammy, Will, Jake, Desarae, Grandpa, Grandma, Great Uncle Wayne, Great Aunt Sally, Nick, John, Michelle, Mona, Mark, Abby, MJ, Dave, Heather, Justin, Ryan, Aunt Kathy, Uncle Steve, Laurie, Amanda, Melissa, Mark, Dawn, Charlie, Katie, Michelle, Alyssa, Mike, Jim, Kathy, Kathy, Orion, Blaine, Chris, Liz, Jordanna, Myrna, Linda, Marty...(I am being played off stage from this Oscar speech now...) and the list goes on...Thanks.

Olympic Sleep Deprivation

2008-08-17T12:23:00.013-04:00

I admit it. I have Olympic Sleep Deprivation...I just can't help it. I stay up WAY too late watching the Olympics. I love the Olympics. I have so many vivid memories over the years. Some because they were great and some because they were embarrassing or funny. I remember Tonya Harding, not for the reasons that you may think...of course I remember the "hit man" style pipe swipe to Nancy Kerrigan's knee-but more memorable I recall her stopping her routine pointing at her skate with her leg held up, whining about her missed jump. Even more vividly, I remember my friend Chip reenacting the scene over and over as we laughed so hard we nearly wet ourselves...

I remember watching firsts, like Jamaica bobsledding and now, Michael Phelps! Can you believe that kid. How exciting! I was squeezing Wayne's hands last night chanting U-S-A, U-S-A as we watched the men's 4x100 relay! Watching history eight gold medals in one olympics!

Yes, I said it. I chant in my house. I find myself riveted by things I would never have thought I would watch, like archery, handball, rowing, badminton and table tennis. I may not understand the scoring to all the events, but that is part of the fun. Learning about these events and the people that devote thier lives to them. I don't know what it is. Is it the patriotism, the personal stories so well told, the fact that during a time our country is at war, I see the world coming together-showing how much more alike we all are than different? I many not understand what some of the other countries parents are saying when their child wins, but I understand what their face says. Pride, excitement, joy. I may be a sap, I may be an idealist, but watching the sportsmanship gives me hope for our world.

I hope you get to watch some diving, swimming, gymnastics or equestrian competitions. It is history being made. I know some of you are, because when I arrive at work glazed over I talk to other people who are also glazed over because they just couldn't tear themselves away from the TV set! I won't even TiVo it and go to bed, because I am afraid I will hear the outcome from someone chatting about it before I have a chance to watch it! So, if you see me glazed over in the next few weeks...you will know where the sleep deprivation is coming from!

One onehundreth of a second...it is worth it. Olympic sleep deprivation anyone?

An All American Weekend...

2008-08-10T19:29:00.020-04:00

Haiden at the beach

I am so thrilled to have revisited some of my best childhood memories and have shared it with my family this weekend. My mom (Linda), myself, my husband (Wayne), his mother (Linda), our daughter (Haiden) and my niece (Desarae) went to Grand Haven for the weekend. The beach house we stayed in belongs to my Great Aunt Sally and Great Uncle Wayne. I was there as a child with Tina, one of their Grandchildren was exactly my age and we got along quite well. Many memories came flooding back. There are four bedrooms with thin walls an no ceilings. When my mom coughed in the bedroom next to us, I had to double check she was not in my bed. It is a very unique and homey experience--not unlike something you might see in the movies.

Great Uncle Wayne and Great Aunt Sally

Aunt Sally and Uncle Wayne are the type of couple that you see holding hands and walking on the beach-STILL at 79 and 80 years old. They have had this beach house since 1963. It has private beach access and beautiful views of Lake Michigan. It was built in the 1920's and they are the second owners. It came furnished...and still has some of the most unique pieces you can imagine. Then, add my Aunt's eclectic collection of antiques, knickknacks and beach themed paraphernalia....along with decades of children's, grand children's and great grand children's gifts and voila! Believe it or not, it is minimalistic and full all at once. My two year old daughter fell in love with an antique wood carving of an old sea captain that my Uncle says reminds us to respect the lake. She was also AMAZED with the singing fish on the wall that sang Don't Worry Be Happy and Take Me To the River! It did not have a volume control...I am sure my Great Aunt and Uncle were for once, thankful that their hearing isn't as good as it used to be.

Desarae on the end of the Pier at the public beach after a walk from Fortino's

(she got a dollar to spend on candy at the historic candy store from her Great Great Aunt Sally)

They are the ultimate hosts. Friday night we were joined by my fourth cousin, Justice. She is really one of the most exquisite 13 year olds I have ever met. She has a special quality that is just compelling. She met us at the bottom of the stairs when we arrived to greet us and help us carry our things up the seventy some steps, she read a 500 page book in one day, helped Aunt Sally and Uncle Wayne the whole day and joined us down the one hundred and one steps down the stairs to the lake, again carrying things to help us. She even admitted to "not even miss my myspace" when she was at the lake. She even stayed on an air mattress so the rest of us could have our own rooms...Did I mention she was 13? She already has college plans and speaks so eloquently. I am so proud of her. Last time I saw her she was 2 at our wedding-time flies.

Justice and I at the lake house

Back to Aunt Sally and Uncle Wayne, they prepared and cooked meals, provided fabulous and spirited discussions about the history of the lake and I was able to reminisce about my late Grandmother. My Grandma Warner was one of the most fabulous women you could imagine. I miss her every day. Sadly and suddenly, she left us in December 1997 at age 70 with no known previous health problems. My Great Aunt Sally was her sister and best friend. So, in spending time with her, I could not stop thinking of my Grandma and feeling her presence around me. We talked about her and remembered her in a way that I haven't done in a while. There were some tears and more insight from my Aunt than I can ever thank her for.

For all of their hospitality, Wayne and I insisted in taking them out to dinner, so they picked their favorite restaurant, the Billandmar Restaurant. Now, Aunt Sally and Uncle Wayne only go out to eat once a year, on their anniversary, so they were so thrilled. They are getting ready to celebrate their 57th wedding anniversary later this month. We all can't be as lucky as they are, but I am telling you, I am insanely respectful and I am feel truly blessed to have had the chance to spend some time with them. My Uncle Wayne said, "I can't believe this" as all eight of us were piled in our van on our way to dinner. "What?" I asked. "That someone is treating us!" This was hard for me to understand. I am sure they don't make it easy for others to treat them, they are the ultimate treaters. So, it was our pleasure to see them in this role. They ordered drinks, dinner and we sat at the window looking out at the lake and all the beauty and power it holds.

At the Billandmar for dinner

On Friday night, there we all were, huddled around an old TV set with rabbit ears, watching the opening ceremonies of the Olympics. Four generations of family up to 5th cousins, ranging from two to 80, watching in awe while listening to the waves crash in the background as the wind blew through the house. It was like stepping back in time to a simple and pure moment (vodka tonics and wine included).

There is something about the water and nature that resets your brain. This was the case for me. I look forward to next summer when I check their calendars to see if they have a free weekend for us to book at the lake.

Wayne and Haiden at Lake Michigan

I am exhausted from all the steps, but giddy from all the love. Among the most precious moments were my daughter doing everything she could to avoid putting her feet in the sand (quite some balance), my niece talking to the lake and playing as if she was a dog, fetching sticks and all, my mom relaxing and smiling at her Grandchildren and my husband taking four trips to the car this morning as we said our goodbyes (seventy some steps -- each way!). My Great Aunt Sally sharing recipes with my Mother in Law and the multiple in unison "What(s)?" that were heard with two Wayne's and two Linda's in the mix!

Haiden balancing on me so her feet don't touch the sand

Thank you to the sunsets, the waves, the old sea captain and to my Great Aunt Sally and Great Uncle Wayne who embody the best America has to offer in work ethic, hospitality, spirit, fun and courage.

Don't Feed Your Cell Phone to the Ducks

2008-07-28T13:04:00.004-04:00

Cell phones just freak me out. I mean, I have one. What if I didn't? Well, I am guessing no one would ever talk to me--and you can't text on land lines, bummer. I work with teens and they may not have money for the bus, but they have a cell phone to call me and tell me they can't come to their appointment because they don't have money for the bus. Cell phones are a sign of status to some, a necessity to others and plain convenience for the rest of us. Take my husband for example. He would go to the store to get three things and come home with five. However, one of the three he went for, he would forget. Now, he just calls me and says, "what else was I going to get?" There. Convenience.

OK, all that just to mention that Wayne is feeling cut off today. Why? Thanks for asking! Did he forget his cell phone? Well...we went on a family outing to MSU on Sunday. We thought it was a good day to go to the Red Cedar River to feed the ducks. Haiden loves it. So, Wayne went to sit on the edge to hold Haiden so she wouldn't fall in, plop. Yep. His cell phone fell out of his sweatshirt pocket and into the river. We both looked at it-like dear in headlights. Wayne blurted an expletive and I just froze. There is was...Haiden's picture was lit and displayed on the bottom of the Red Cedar River. "Are you going to get it?" I asked. He took his sandals off and hopped in to retrieve it. It no longer glowed. It was kaput! We tried drying it out, trading batteries, but nothing. It was gone. Now, Wayne is awaiting a refurbished phone via mail. Don't worry, not all was lost. The memory card allowed Wayne to get all of the pictures and video clips off. Even the picture of me, miserable in labor, all bloated with a washcloth on my head. Hmmmmm....I wouldn't have minded if THAT had been lost.

Lesson: Don't wear a sweatshirt on 80 degree days (what was he doing wearing a sweatshirt on Sunday anyway?), and if you are silly enough to do so, don't put anything of value in the pockets and lean over water. I hope this fabulous piece of advice helps you out someday. Seriously, the first company to make a water resistant cell phone will be genius--and loaded. Come on, we all know someone who's phone fell in the toilet, or the Red Cedar River-same difference.

Overwhelmed and Inspired

2008-07-23T18:59:00.007-04:00

Do you ever get overwhelmed hearing other people's problems? Just sitting with one's own life's problems can be exhausting. I have several very tough cases right now. I adore the very often labeled "juvenile delinquents," "disrespectful lazy teens," and my least favorite "directionless" human beings I work with. They hear those other things all the time. I have a different perspective.

I understand that I get to see their best selves. One on one, in a room with them with no outside pressures and complete confidentiality (except child abuse and/or harm to self or others, which I CLEARLY cover I can't keep private). Do you know what I see? I see overlooked, under appreciated survivors. The teens I work with may act out, use drugs, do illegal things and yes, sometimes present with a bad attitude. These same teens were once kids who have experienced some things you couldn't imagine. If you heard their childhood stories you would throw money at their "cause" and have sympathy and empathy unending.

In two and a half years, I haven't met a teen who hasn't experienced at least ONE major trauma. Yet, they are funny, they are smart, they are wise beyond their years at times. They are hip, they are cool, they are real. I am glad they are alive and feel privileged to be let into a world that many are not. If you will, take a moment to remember what it was like to be a teenager. Remember what it was like when your heart was broken, hormones raging, or you were covering for your family because they weren't perfect? Remember when you drank, or you lied, or you felt insecure? Remember that these teens are real and deserve to be honored for their experiences.

I am not suggesting they not be held accountable for the choices they make. Trust me, they are. From their teachers to their probation officers, from their parents to their community, they are. What they are NOT getting is the recognition that they have potential and that they have SO MANY strengths. Although right now I am feeling overwhelmed by the pieces of them I carry with me, I feel even more empowered to put out in the universe how lucky I am to see their best selves. I hope you will take a moment and honor them with me. Thank you for listening and thanks to them for teaching me so much I would not have known without their candor and bravery to share. How lucky I am. How lucky I am.

Sometimes, You Get What You Pay For

2008-07-18T21:44:00.007-04:00

I was with my two girls at water aerobics at the YMCA in Haslett on Wednesday. We were working out, catching up and chat, chat, chatting. I was watching the people around...the children that seem to be there doing family swim with no adult with them, the manic splasher that was lane swimming RIGHT behind me (nice view underwater I am sure. I had no view since the splashed water blinded me.), the early 20's lifeguard that looked so passive and bored, the others in class-buzzing with chatter in their little hives. Just a typical day at the Y.

Then, like a sleeping dog snaps to when he hears a squirrel, this young, previously passive, life guard has what I believe was the most exciting two minutes of his week. The instructor overheard a lady in class question if that was lightening outside. The instructor saw it and directed the lifeguard to check it out. He charged over to the window and verified lightening and jumped into action. He blew his whistle like a ref with a game determining call and proceeded to VERY ASSERTIVELY state, "Everyone out of the pool! It is not safe. EVERYONE OUT OF THE POOL." He moved faster and more assertively than his demeanor had suggested possible. We all proceeded to move out of the pool. Our instructor told us we had to get out because, "there are pipes under the pool that are not grounded and if lightening strikes we will all turn to goo." That is right folks, goo. Hmmm...I thought. "why don't they ground it?" I asked the instructor. "I don't know, but if you are at the Mac, you can stay in the pool. It is grounded." she answered.

OK, so I paused to ask myself a few questions (out of the pool of course). 1. What if no one had seen the lightening? 2. What if there were no windows at the pool? 3. Are they aware that in Michigan the weather changes on a dime...? 4. Do you get what you pay for? 5. Should safety be more accessible for those who pay more? In the end, I am not goo...and that life guard had 2 minutes of adrenaline filled action. I was actually impressed. At lease he has it in him to jump out of his stoned-like state if I were to nearly drown. I wonder if he does rescue people or if you have to pay more for that? :)

Oh, the instructor told us we are not supposed to shower either. I took my chances...she did too as well as everyone else in class. Should that be posted somewhere? I wonder if the Mac has signs? Signed, the gooless Jaim

Do I Have Skeeter Syndrome?

2008-07-15T19:59:00.010-04:00

I think I can clearly speak for every resident and visitor to Michigan when I say, "I am sick of mosquitoes!" Every time the dogs come in, those little blood suckers hitch a ride. When I am outside, I get bit AT LEAST twenty times more than the person next to me. I love being outside in the summer...come on we are forced to spend so much time inside during the winter! The bites hurt and look a little ugly too. I am really beginning to HATE the little buggers.

Upon getting fed up by all my bites, I thought..."everything has a purpose, right?" WRONG-O. Mosquitoes do nothing but carry diseases and viruses from person to person. Mosquitoes infect 700 million people annually. Not little things like a cold, but MALARIA, WEST NILE VIRUS and YELLOW FEVER...just things that kill people especially children and the elderly....Not rooting for the mosquitoes yet.

Why do I get bit so much? "Don't wear perfume or nice smelling hair products." I am told over and over again. Then I find out the following: "Mosquitoes use carbon dioxide (CO2) and 1-octen-3-ol1 from human and animal breath and sweat as odor cues." ODOR cues? SO, maybe it is not my fancy smelling products, but perhaps I am one stinky girl! Twenty times MORE stinky than others...I just think I have sweet meat. I must be yummy. (Denial kicking in?)

Then the misogyny comes in. Only female mosquitoes suck blood AND they DO NOT need it to live. Females as literal bloodsuckers in this depiction.

Then I find out there are lucky people among us. Some adults (not me!) can become desensitized to mosquitoes and have little or no reaction to their bites (lucky few). Hmmm, while others can become hyper-sensitive with bites causing blistering, bruising, and large inflammatory reactions, a response known as Skeeter Syndrome. Do I have Skeeter Syndrome?! I must admit I would love to tell people I have it. I sounds kinda fun--if it weren't for the symptoms.

I still don't want to HATE. Hating is so ugly. Perhaps mosquitoes provide needed sustenance for some fantastic creatures. Yes, that must be it. There. There in lies their purpose. NOPE WRONG AGAIN. Although dragonflies (I do love dragonflies), bats (bats rock) and Purple Martins (I've been known to be a bird watcher) eat mosquito's, they make up less than 1% of their diet. Bottom line. I HATE MOSQUITOES.

Top 10 Things I Have Learned While Trying Not To Be a Mosquito Hater!

(AKA Top 10 Reasons I HATE Mosquitoes)

10. Mosquito bites hurt-and then itch and itch, a long lasting "i was here."

9. There is no beauty added by red swollen blotches. (I look like some sorta patient...)

8. Mosquitoes don't do anything for the environment (and everyone is going green).

7. Mosquitoes don't even provide enough food for dragonflies or bats to even snack on!

6. DEET (our best weapon against THEM besides NETS) can have negative effects on the Central Nervous System.

5. Mosquitoes actually kill people. (little murders, that is what they are.)

4. We are driven to wear long sleeves and layers in the SUMMER. (uh, humidity isn't enough?)

3. Females get a bad rap again. (side note: 99% of scientists are men, I am just saying.)

2. I am much stinkier than I previously thought (thanks for the heads up, friends).

and the number one reason I HATE mosquitoes?

1. Skeeter Syndrome. I may not have it, but it still exists.

DOWN WITH SKEETERS!

Say It Isn't So?

2008-07-15T08:53:00.003-04:00

So, as I am driving to work today, I hear that Jimmy Kimmel and Sarah Silverman broke up. Why should this matter to me? I am a hopeless romantic, yes, I am a realist too. I always come to the defense of celebrities because I have empathy for how their lives are spun. But, back to Jimmy and Sarah. I just loved the thought of them together. They are both so funny and make me laugh-I could only imagine a life of laughter, wit, etc. Of course they are celebrities so why should I even be pondering it? I realize I don't know a thing about their real lives but, here is what I am pondering...Was Sarah Silverman really .... Matt Damon? OR Was Jimmy Kimmel really ... Ben Afflec?! We just will never know (utube it if you don't know what I am referring to :) if those skits had more truth than fiction. In the end, I guess it is just hard to picture Jimmy Kimmel mad. Try it. Hard isn't it?

Post Vacation Depression

2008-07-13T20:36:00.031-04:00

Post Vacation Depression...I think this should be an official code in the DSM. They have practically everything else in there, so why not this? I want to be diagnosed today with post-vacation depression. I just got back from Boston and it was a fabulous eleven year anniversary trip.

Awwwwe, showing some love on our Anniversary.

Haiden stayed with my Mom, she is a saint for keeping Haiden for us, so we could get away together. Don't worry, Mom got some gifts brought back for her.

Wayne and I checked out Boston for three and a half days. We had a blast! We had some fine dining and checked out some Bostonian famous digs, like Cheers. We had a sunset cruise on Boston Harbor.

The Boston Harbour at Sunset.

We took a tour around Boston, including a trip to Paul Revere's house, visited the oldest commissioned war ship in the world, the USS Constitution (Old Iron Side) and saw some other historical places. We wandered around little Italy...tasting the best cannoli I have ever had at Mike's Pastry, a Boston landmark.

Chocolate Chip Cannoli from Mike's Pastry.

We went to see the Blue Man Group and toured Harvard and MIT (I feel smarter for just having been there). I loved Boston. It is where the Revolutionary War began, thus leading to our nation's independence. You feel the spunk in the people of Boston's spirits. They LOVE their sports teams and have a zest for life. I also can't get enough of that accent. "Paak the caa in Haavad Yaard."

Wayne and I on the trolley for our city tour.

I look forward to my next trip to Boston, it has passed Philadelphia on my list of favorite cities, but NYC still tops my list. Boston is a close second because of the family feel. Their are parks everywhere and it is very family friendly, while still being a city with so much action and history to offer!

Wayne and I visually expressing our joy of being on vacation.

The best part about returning was seeing our little girl. But going back to work tomorrow and being away from my family AND vacation...Post Vacation Depression here I come. At least I have the memories...

Wayne and I thinking about ending vacation :).

The picture for the DSM for the craziness that can be caused by Post Vacation Depression.

Spittin' Some Knowledge

2008-07-09T19:39:00.018-04:00

I work with teenagers, and sometimes when they speak...I am left wondering what they said. I ask, they laugh and then they fill me in. Here are some things I've learned.

He ganked my fitted. = He stole my fitted baseball hat.

She's soft and scary. = She won't do anything, she is afraid (scared) of me.

I was ear hustlin'. = I was eavesdropping. (this one is my favorite!)

I'm no tweak! = I am not addicted.

From the Lean Man. = From the guy that illegally sells prescription liquid codeine.

Lean, szyrup, purple = Liquid Codeine or Promethazine (presciption liquid cough syrup with codeine)

I smashed. = I ate so much.

She's bad = She is very attractive.

Snitch = tattle tale

Snitches get stitches = People who tell will get beat up.

She hoed my life. = She broke up with me.
She hoed my life. = She cheated on me.
She hoed my life. = She talked behind my back.
She hoed my life. = She did something bad to me.

He's fake = He pretends to be tough or he pretends to be a gang member

Deuces = Peace out = Good bye

She's a bop. = She gets around sexually.

He's my husband or She's my wifey = He's my boyfriend or she's my girlfriend.

Forces = Air Force One's (Nike tennis shoes)

I am down with the clown = I am a fan of Insane Clown Posse'

Juggalo = Insane Clown Posse' Male fan

Juggalet = Insance Clown Posse' Female fan

Emo = Peson who is often depressed, sometimes cuts themself and dresses in black with dark hair slicked over one eye.

Everyone has dirt. = Everyone has illegal things they do.

Stick = marijuana also means cigar paper wraped marijuana

He did me a solid. = He did me a favor.

I'm a hot boy = The police watch me (similarly, that house is hot, that neighborhood is hot = an easy place to get caught or a place the police watch)

'Nuff said, deuces! = I think I have said enough, goodbye!

The Middles

2008-07-08T14:18:00.006-04:00

Apparently, there are two types of people in this country. The haves, and the have-nots. Those few of us who are still in the middle could go either way. They say we are all three paychecks from the edge. On the other hand, the middles get to sample the have's lives now and then.

My 85 minutes as a have: I go to the spa and experience an elemental facial. I don't know what I am doing when I get to the spa, but luckily, there are kind people who know it is my first time and they guide me. I get my robes on and have my feet soaked in some fabulously smelling water while I wait, sipping on water nibbling a grape, reading a magazine. That was the beginning of my have experience. There I am. I listen to the mood music, smell the aroma therapy candles and enjoy the dim lighting and people watching. There is a petite woman in high end work out gear, I am guessing just arriving from her personal trainer, with this look on her face. I think about the look and realize it is fulfillment. I imagine she had the nanny looking after the children as she went to see her personal trainer and then to the spa, where I "over hear" her saying she will be having some 4 hour treatment. Also, in the waiting area is a young twenty something and her groom to be getting pampered. They are so giddy and clearly enthused by the other's company. A treat. Not a regular occasion like Ms. High End, but a treat. Where did I fit in? I got the gift cards for Christmas and finally decided to use them. I was a middle getting a taste of the have's life. What was I waiting for? It was FABULOUS!! 85 minutes of pure self indulgence. Relaxation, a facial, beautiful relaxing music, massage...ahhhh. AH HA! I realized Ms. High End had that look on her face because she knew what she was in for. This was no treat, this was a part of life, you know like I go to the store, she goes to the spa. Hmmmmmm.

I could be bitter, but why? I wasn't bitter, but for that moment, I considered what it might be like to be a have. What about the have-nots? Would they ever get a taste of the have's life, or was the tasting just for the middles? Was that look on Ms. High End's face always there, or did she marry for money and earn every cent? Well, I don't know. I do know that the middles should pamper themselves. We should taste the life of the haves. We should also be aware of the have-nots. It is a gift to be afforded the opportunity to sample the have life and not forget the have-nots that many of us serve.

With that said, for 85 minutes I didn't think about ANY of you people. None of you. Not my friends, not my family. Nope, so sorry. No starving children, no addicts, no depressed souls. I thought about me! I was self indulgent. This CLEARLY just wouldn't have been the Jaim without me. ME! ME! ME! It was liberating in a way. I plan to celebrate me again soon. Think about doing the same. :)

Sanity achieved!

Canoeing together shows one's true colors.

2008-07-07T09:12:00.009-04:00

I believe that canoeing together tells a story. Who leads, who follows. Teamwork, is it there or not? The couple that successfully canoe's together will stay together, it is that simple. Not only that, but you see people's true colors when in a canoe, dating colors, friendship colors, care taking colors, power and control colors...

Let me explain. This past weekend Wayne and I took three of our dearest and closest friends canoeing. They have never been to Michigan and wanted to do something that was simply Michigan. Listening to the "Pure Michigan" commercials that Tim Allen lends his voice to, I thought about the "free flowing waters of Michigan." So, we went canoeing.

The adventure began when we were crammed into a van that should have fit 10 people. I had made a reservation for 4pm for the five of us and there were 7 other people who joined in the day of at the park (doing the math yet?). There were 13 of us in a van that fit 10, including the driver who looked like he might JUST have turned 16. So, our buddy Nick was on the end of a seat with me, John and Michelle, dangling off the end with just one half of one cheek on the seat. We were all sun screened and bug sprayed up, so the tight squeeze and closeness was quite stinky. Nick, having survived cancer twice and a tour in Afghanistan, didn't complain, he just used all of his core muscles and his quads to balance. Wayne was in the far back seat with three strangers, none of them of the petite variety. They had taken the entire seat up, so Wayne was sardined in with his hinney on the wheel well. "How are you doing back there, Wayne?" I asked as we bounced around. "good" he grumbled under his breath as we hit a bump slamming him into the wheel well. I must admit I admired Wayne's technique. Wayne had a good technique. He starred out the window the whole time. I guess he thought if he didn't look at the others, he wouldn't have to be reminded that their bodies were stuck together with sweat.

"How much longer to the drop off point?" I asked, thinking of my guests and husband. "About nine minutes." I was told. Well, we could do ANYTHING for nine quick, short minutes right? It was just upon about the time that thought ran through my head that we got behind a farm vehicle going about 10 mph. "that just doubled our trip time, eh?" said Nick with a snicker. Sure, I thought, "hang tight ya'll." Murphy, being the law that it is, didn't fulfill its' duty at that time. Remember, our driver, being about 16? He made the brilliant decision to PASS the farm vehicle. I thought we were going to be the next morning's headline. "13 killed in van (that fit 10) pulling trailer of 8 canoes. The 16 year old driver decided that he would PASS a farm vehicle crossing a solid yellow line." Well, just as this crossed my mind, I heard Nick say, "well, maybe it won't double our travel time." he laughed and looked at my pale face and said, "my gut says we will make it, Jaim." So, I closed my eyes and before I knew it, we were around the vehicle and on the road again. Ok, probably only 8 minutes left now! YE HAW! I was giddy, knowing that our trip down the river was minutes away and then...Murphy visited again... CRASH! BAM! SCRAPPPPPEEEEE! A canoe fell off the trailer and was being dragged on the asphalt. "I think our travel time just got doubled." Laughed Nick, still dangling off the end of our seat-muscles tight. We all kind of laughed, you know in that, I am sure we will make it there- but we all stink and are, uh, too close for comfort kind of laughing way.

Alas, the driver jumped out of the van, loaded the canoe back on, jumped back into the van and took off. I was at this time cautiously optimistic that we would be there relatively soon (note the change in my tone? what you hear is optimism turned to reality). "That is the first one that has fallen all season." the Driver quietly said as he drove on.

I was thinking about this potentially damaged canoe. "I don't want that canoe. You know, the one that fell" I blurted. I couldn't contain myself. I wanted to call dibs. That is right, NON-dibs dibs. I didn't want to "test" the fallen canoe. No one said anything in response, so I felt victorious! I called it- or non-called it and no one challenged. Phew. Ok, so we got there, I quickly claimed two non-dragged canoes and we were the first in the water. Wayne and I were in the heavy, green fiberglass canoe. It was the widest, so Michelle took a cushion and sat in the middle with our cooler and our snacks. John and Nick took the lighter, faster, easier to maneuver aluminum canoe and we were off. Upon paddling about 10 times, I said, "perhaps we should give some of the extra weight to Nick and John." So, we asked the boys to paddle up close so we could hand off the cooler. We did it with no problems and we were off again. It was seamless, like a precise military maneuver, after all the boys were all military or former military. It was a beautiful sunny day and just the perfect temperature-a great way to show off what Michigan had to offer. We heard one of the other couples in our comfy van ride arguing from the start. So, we pulled ahead as not to hear the bickering. It was too nice of a day for Debbie and Don Downer to steal the show...

Soon, two canoes caught up with us. One carrying the not so petite, cigarette smoking, cursing, bickering couple and the other canoe carrying three young college aged canoers. "are you with them?" I asked the trio. "uh, yep." the male in the back of the canoe answered, all three of them were smiling in that -uh huh, we will claim them- way. We were approaching a narrow opening in the river. A tree had fallen on both sides leaving just enough space to maneuver through. Nick and John were close behind the bickering couple. The bickering couple, well they were bickering still as their canoe turned sideways not leaving enough clearance for them to make it through the opening. The male bickerer firmly shouted "duck" and she, the female bickerer, firmly shouted."AHHHHHH SH#!" and did not duck. Instead she grabbed onto the branch that was hanging down which jolted the canoe to a halt catapulting the male bickerer into the water. KA-SPLOOSH! It was quite hilarious and a little scary, I worried for the female bickerer a bit. It appeared that she was pinned under the branch laying on her back holding tight. He was holding the side of the canoe. The couple was still bickering. He was saying, "let go!" She was shouting, "NO WAY!" This continued. Nick and John quickly made it through and Wayne and I back paddled, slowed down and made it through as well. Michelle, adorning the bright orange life jacket, said, "I am not a good swimmer." Wayne was reassuring her, "nothing is going to happen to you. You have a life vest on and I won't let anything happen to you, just duck." Wayne's reassurance helped me as well. We made it! Teamwork. I look behind me to see the couple still engaged in the bickering. "give up, you are going in." said the male bickerer. "If I get out I won't be able to get back in!" Shouted the female bickerer. I thought I would lend what seemed to be some helpful, and common sense advice. "just get out, get to the bank and then get back in. It will be easier to get back in from shore." They didn't answer, but did pause their bickering for a moment to contemplate the thought, and we headed forward.

Here's where the true colors shined through. Nick and John turned Hawaii Five-O on us and retrieved the bickerers paddles and headed back to help them out. "you got this??" Wayne asked. Nick responded, "We are just going to hang here until they are out of panic mode and then get them their paddles back. We have it handled." "you OK Babe?" John asks Michelle. "yep, I'm good." So, there we were. All of us exposed. Nick used all of his military--and boyscout training to assess the situation, realize the couple was not in grave danger and make the safe decision to lend rescue efforts while not getting taken down with the panicking bickerers. John's colors shined through as he checked on his wife since neither of them were good swimmers. John and Nick showed their service to others with their help in retrieving the oars and bringing them back to the bickerers. Wayne showed his care taking to me and Michelle by slowly taking us through the challenge reassuring us that he wouldn't let anything happen to us. He also offered to help the couple, but agreed with John and Nick that it be better for them to do it, since he had Michelle, the non swimming first time canoer in the canoe. I showed that I would offer some solid advice to the bickerers even knowing they could at any moment curse me out-a chance worth taking.

If you are thinking what I was thinking, I am sure you are thinking about the other three that claimed to be with the bickerers. Well, they were snickering slowing down and just watching it all unfold. I am guessing this is not the first time they have seen the couple in a situation that is just, well, priceless. The bickerers? What did I learn about them? Well, once back in the canoe and on the river, they finally agreed. "sh#! we just lost our SMOKES!" said the male bickerer. "OH, NO, honey, you are right! Shi#!!!" Alas, their priorities were in sync.

So, the moral of this story is if you want to get to know someones true colors, canoe with them!

All in all it was a great trip, created some good memories and showed me the true colors of my friends. I am sure my humor was appreciated as well. After all, It just wouldn't have been the Jaim without me. :)

Go Green or Go Home!

2008-07-01T12:44:00.005-04:00

What I am contemplating today...

When you follow your husband's military career for 11 years, your resume looks schizophrenic.
A Master's Degree in Counseling: The degree you pay the most for the least return. That is right folks...it doesn't pay much money working for nonprofits.

So, what to do?

A. Find a nice stable job that pays more, Or
B. Do what I feel passionately about

For 11 years I have chosen B. Now, I have a child, I am staying put in one state, there are simply more things to consider. Is there a way to get A and B? I, being the ever optimist, say "Yes!" I could work at MSU with students using all of my rapport building, assessment, people and detail oriented skills to kick some major tail. The problem: the schizophrenic resume.

Many feel to work at MSU, you must first work at MSU. Hmmm, not much attrition there. Having done career counseling in one of my many traveling careers, I am telling myself what I would tell others. Network. Look for a mentor. Navigate through the system. Alas, I am following my own advice. I have begun the trek and have found the people I have met with to be simply fabulous. I am networking, taking notes, setting up meetings. I am marketing myself. What will the pay off be?

Today, I am following the law of attraction. I am putting out in the universe that I will work at MSU and be an asset to the University I bleed green for as well as make a positive impact on the students. As a first generation woman that completed college in my family and the first person to receive a Master's Degree, I know anything can be done. I value education. I understand the need to have passionate and capable people work toward promoting life altering decisions at a prime point in student's brain-and life development. I just want MSU to see the drive and follow through behind my goal. After all, it's just not the Jaim without me!

So, this is blogsville!

2008-06-25T18:26:00.001-04:00

A year ago, I had no idea what a blog was. Now I get it. It is our chance to be Carrie Bradshaw in a very ordinary way. I dig it. This will be an experience. They got something right--spell check! BONUS!. Well, armed with my spell check and my version of recom, you know reality and comedy, this should be a blast. After all, it's just not the Jaim without me.