Do you ever get overwhelmed hearing other people's problems? Just sitting with one's own life's problems can be exhausting. I have several very tough cases right now. I adore the very often labeled "juvenile delinquents," "disrespectful lazy teens," and my least favorite "directionless" human beings I work with. They hear those other things all the time. I have a different perspective.
I understand that I get to see their best selves. One on one, in a room with them with no outside pressures and complete confidentiality (except child abuse and/or harm to self or others, which I CLEARLY cover I can't keep private). Do you know what I see? I see overlooked, under appreciated survivors. The teens I work with may act out, use drugs, do illegal things and yes, sometimes present with a bad attitude. These same teens were once kids who have experienced some things you couldn't imagine. If you heard their childhood stories you would throw money at their "cause" and have sympathy and empathy unending.
In two and a half years, I haven't met a teen who hasn't experienced at least ONE major trauma. Yet, they are funny, they are smart, they are wise beyond their years at times. They are hip, they are cool, they are real. I am glad they are alive and feel privileged to be let into a world that many are not. If you will, take a moment to remember what it was like to be a teenager. Remember what it was like when your heart was broken, hormones raging, or you were covering for your family because they weren't perfect? Remember when you drank, or you lied, or you felt insecure? Remember that these teens are real and deserve to be honored for their experiences.
I am not suggesting they not be held accountable for the choices they make. Trust me, they are. From their teachers to their probation officers, from their parents to their community, they are. What they are NOT getting is the recognition that they have potential and that they have SO MANY strengths. Although right now I am feeling overwhelmed by the pieces of them I carry with me, I feel even more empowered to put out in the universe how lucky I am to see their best selves. I hope you will take a moment and honor them with me. Thank you for listening and thanks to them for teaching me so much I would not have known without their candor and bravery to share. How lucky I am. How lucky I am.
I understand that I get to see their best selves. One on one, in a room with them with no outside pressures and complete confidentiality (except child abuse and/or harm to self or others, which I CLEARLY cover I can't keep private). Do you know what I see? I see overlooked, under appreciated survivors. The teens I work with may act out, use drugs, do illegal things and yes, sometimes present with a bad attitude. These same teens were once kids who have experienced some things you couldn't imagine. If you heard their childhood stories you would throw money at their "cause" and have sympathy and empathy unending.
In two and a half years, I haven't met a teen who hasn't experienced at least ONE major trauma. Yet, they are funny, they are smart, they are wise beyond their years at times. They are hip, they are cool, they are real. I am glad they are alive and feel privileged to be let into a world that many are not. If you will, take a moment to remember what it was like to be a teenager. Remember what it was like when your heart was broken, hormones raging, or you were covering for your family because they weren't perfect? Remember when you drank, or you lied, or you felt insecure? Remember that these teens are real and deserve to be honored for their experiences.
I am not suggesting they not be held accountable for the choices they make. Trust me, they are. From their teachers to their probation officers, from their parents to their community, they are. What they are NOT getting is the recognition that they have potential and that they have SO MANY strengths. Although right now I am feeling overwhelmed by the pieces of them I carry with me, I feel even more empowered to put out in the universe how lucky I am to see their best selves. I hope you will take a moment and honor them with me. Thank you for listening and thanks to them for teaching me so much I would not have known without their candor and bravery to share. How lucky I am. How lucky I am.
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